Cuma Curhat Doang

God,
I feel hurt..
Cos there's a probability that she is with him now..
This is the second time, yeah i know i'm hurting myself, not she hurt me..
God.. so what for, she follow me, what for, she msg me, she want to meet for just a little lunhc?
It's just hurt me..again.. :(
And why she not even worried when I'm sick..
Why she like greening at my status somehow..

It's hurts
and also it's my fault.. again..

I just want to end it once again, God..
how?
or I sud really2 keep in this until sometime?

don't understand, how selfish she is..
or she just thinking that I'm okay with her as friend right now?

yeah its my fault.. to open up this heart once in a while..
and how to deal with it?
she just don't even care if I'm with somebody else
and in fact, i don't have somebody else..!!

God, her happiness is your business, not mine..
but I just confuse how to face this thing?
Yeah, just let it flow Poeh
let her try her want and her will
what her thought that good for her

Holy God, I lose my spirit
to look for a job
to wake up
to make my life
to find someone else

I lose my spirit to serve U
I lose my life
I lose my self

please help me
to face the truth
to get better
to be a person

God, where will it come?
I'm tired and lacking time to wait and wait again
feel like the world is running and left me
what shud I do?
everything seems wrong

God, please change me to be a better man
so I cud be myself
find a job
make a family
serve U better

everything seems impossible right now
though nothing impossible with u, but this is really happen
i'm in depressed

Goooodddddddd... please help me
make it real, make it fast..
I don't wanna stuck in here
but I wanna run.. run fast

God.. please make it possible..

what can I do? what shud I do?

I'm losing my way.. :(

somehow hoping she's getting married soon
so she wud not bother me..
but it'll hurt.. coz she's still being a part of me
and indefenetely I'm a part of her?
just not sure..

:(

take care of her, God
always
coz I love her, more than anything in this world
and maybe becos of that, you take her from me..

forgive me and teach me to be better
to love U better
and to be better yours

thanks God..